What do you see?

Yesterdays view from the passenger seat

What do you see? The menacing dark clouds or the beauty of the sun rays tearing through? Or do you see the weeds at the bottom that despite their low position reach tall and grow despite the adversity of not being wanted nor beautiful, reach high and proud to bathe in the sunlight and warmth?

How we view what we each encounter has an enormous impact on what we see. My own recent therapy sessions have made me take stock of all the negative events in my whole life, not one event, but many, many that could have defined me, if I let them. It is quite a revelation to realise that we rarely define ourselves by our own achievement or success story. I am not saying that at the time each hasn’t challenged me and broken me to a certain extent. But not for too long.

What is too long? Too long is when people start avoiding speaking to you and prefer to text, because you literally bring them down, you drain them. When you no longer see anything in a positive way at all. Where life really is just dealing you lemons; one after the other. I think we all get to this point sometimes, hopefully not too-often-times. It is then that we need help or to make a serious change in our lives: ours way is not working, so it is time to stop doing it our way and try a different way. Help is not an embarrassment or admitting failure or despair. It is just saying ‘I didn’t expect this and I don’t have the tools or strength to deal with it alone’.

Counselling through the doctor takes so long but it is worth getting on the waiting list and in the meantime self help: read recommended books by people in your situations – you will never be unique in your situation. Someone on the internet will have written / blogged about it at some time. Samaritans are listeners. No judgement. People that want to listen so that you may be able to cope a little better, one step at a time.

Exercise is exhausting, especially when getting out of bed is overwhelming but get outside, close those sad and heavy eyes and just simply b-r-e-a-t-h-e. Nature has been around hundreds, thousands, of years and seen and heard many events, secrets and lies. Let nature caress your soul and look after you. Cold or hot, sunny or rainy, it is living and a constant.

One step at a time. We all need to move forward. In this photo I saw the beautiful sunrays and I smiled because nature does that for me. I bloody love this planet and this humanity I was lucky enough to be born into. Today I see its beauty and therefore today will be a good day.

https://www.samaritans.org/

What do you to clear your head?

I live in a flat and have done for nearly two years. I can see outside, I can step on to a balcony. I can hear, smell and see the town. But it does not bring me peace. For all of us it is something different.

A couple of years ago I hugged a tree for the first time in my life. Having chosen the exact tree, drawn to it like a puppy in a rehoming centre. I took a moment, breathed in deeply and wrapped my arms around its all-knowing geriatric trunk and Nature herself coursed through my body.

A tree has seen so many seasons; grows, sheds and shoots year in year out. It just IS. When you wrap your arms around a tree you become just a being. Not a ‘Karen’ with a perceived hundred-thousand stresses and issues to sort, texts/ emails to send, people to impress or let down. Just one human BEING.

I have found the same solace sitting in my local park. With eyes closed I listen to the birds and wind blowing through the leaves. And by the sea – literally sat at the tides edge, eyes closed, listening to waves as they ebb and reassuringly whisper ‘sssssssh’ along the shingle.

Mother Nature places her hand on my forehead, holds me to her breast and strokes my hair, I am saved and I am safe and my head is cleared.